I just happened to look for the first time since Christmas. A momentary slip! I promise it will be months before I look again! I just feel a sadness looking there because it reminds me of my stupidity, and whatever nonsense I caused. If anyone gets under your skin, I hope you know they’re trying to press a button to get to you. You look so thin. That’s the first thing I thought when in a purple blouse and pants. And it’s such an absurd subject, anyway, when you’re a goddess out of reach. And that’s why they do it. People who ache for you, and knowing they can never be with you. And miserable with their lives. They throw anything against the wall, hoping something will stick. To find a button with you. You’re the most beautiful woman in the world. The over-the-top things I’ve done, I’ve never done for any girl I’ve ever seen. And I know I’ll never do anything like it again. Like most guys in the world, I’d be embarrassed to even meet you. I won’t even post a video until I hopefully look my best. Because you are so out of anyone’s league. I used to have a ‘friend’ who would do that to me. I’d be so happy with myself with something I had done, and he’d say a comment so similarly. And although I tried to not let it show, it was like feeling the air go out of a balloon. And I’d look back at it years later, and think – privately – “My God, I was beautiful back then.” It’s so obviously what it was. And yet I’d let something like that affect my day. I’d give away my power to people who never deserved it in the first place. I know you’re so much stronger than me!! I just hope you never let anyone get to you like that. Words can be spells, and if they find any insecurity, they really can take over and find a spot in you and fester. That’s the goal, and they’ll especially say it more the thinner you’ve become! For some reason, I’ve been immersed in Karen Carpenter videos, and she had been so beautiful. Then snide people who never stood a chance, would take shots, and she let it get to her, and she wasted away. When what she had been was so perfect before! It’s such a sexist thing. But sometimes guys get it, too, and I know how it feels. I never talk about your body because I’m so lost in your face and your eyes. But as a guy it’s not lost on me how every part of you is beautiful. The stupidity of it all is you’re absolutely perfect. And they know it, too. It’s why they try to get to you. I know I’ve said it so many times, but I’ve honestly never seen any person so beautiful as you. … I’m sorry I said so much. It just bothered me. Because you’re so immaculate, and everything about you is so exciting. You lift me. And I know you do others, as well. You add such magic to people’s lives. It would kill me to think any words used as weapons, futile and hopelessly from those who actually pine for you, would ever ever ever find a place in you. You’re the most beautiful woman in the world. It’s really, honestly true. ❤️ Thank you for inspiring me in ways nobody else could ever do. It really means the world to me to receive a look from you. You’re like this glimpse of heaven coming through, into an ordinary life. It warms me so much inside!! You’re this sunshine coming through. I can effortlessly say there has never been anyone so beautiful as you. And those other sad people know it, too. Please never ever let your star dim inside. When I look up, I expect to see you there. All the time. ❤️  

I just walked in the door at 4:14, and I recognized that voice a mile away! *sigh!!!* You are absolute perfection. The world simply stops – including my breathing! – every time you’re seen. You are so spectacularly beautiful!!! A purple ‘fav’ again!! And your super hero alias look when in your glasses. It’s one of so many breathtaking looks. It’s magic. *You’re* magic. I know it’s a bit of a ‘serious-look day’, but you light up the whole place!!! Inside and out!! Above and below!! Down and up!! Everywhere you show up!! This heartwarming feeling that comes over and pervades all over everyone and everything! Simply because you were seen!! It’s so funny – everything just *stops* when your voice is heard. When your wonderful face appears, seemingly magically. I promise new posts this week!! (“No! It’s really okay!!” she says) 😅 You can see I’ve used “magic” three times, so I know my expressing isn’t quite in form. But I can feel it coming back!! Lucky me!! As for you, if you read, I hope it’s something you can endure. It’s just because you’re so beautiful, and it feels a gift to see you. So it’s something I can give back. To you. To say thank you. For lighting up my life. 🥰

Thank you for all the magic you add! And that look that saves lives! Ah, I wish I had the words! I’ll be writing again. New posts will start next week. Every time I fear it’s through, this new reserve arrives – from what feels an endless reservoir, of all this love for you. It’s so amazing what you do!! It’s so heartwarming who you are. You’re this guaranteed place of magic and warmth, no matter how cold the day. I hope you know so very deeply how special you are. Thank you for inspiring me endlessly. ❤️  

I don’t know what it is, but you actually glow when on my screen. In that moment you’re waiting to speak, all eyes are on you. You radiate with this ethereal energy. A new dress (blouse!). Something about you and purple. Your hair effortlessly perfect. And when you do speak, the room is yours. The world is yours. And there’s this breathlessness. Everything hinges on every word of yours, every sound you make, every head tilt. Every bit of magic! That’s what you are. You’re this magic spell that happens every time you’re seen. There is simply no one who has your profound effect. You lift things up. There’s this wonderful feeling. You’re heartbreakingly beautiful. You’re brilliant beyond words. I feel I’ve lost my magical powers – not that they got me far. 😅 I just hit this place of exhaustion the last week or so, and although I feel so deeply, it’s like the words won’t come. I guess my body has needed a break, to kind of breathe and reset. But you’re never not noticed. And it’s never not a profound effect. You’re so truly special. It’s a gift to get so dizzily lost in the wonder of you. Nobody does what you do. The whole world is so proud of you.

🥰