Perhaps you’re in pain because the one you love doesn’t love you back. But look at all you’ve gained. By simply being in and of this world, that person opened doors in you of feeling. You were silly. You were brave. You moved with your heart instead of your head, but made more of a splash in doing so than any logic would have allowed. You dared to push the walls of reason to the brink, and in doing so opened up a whole new space inside. It hurts, but there is a kind of beauty in the pain because it reminds you of how deep your being goes. How deeply you can love. You still carry hope, because hope is the very air you breathe. But that hope now looks like a sun ray shaped in a question mark. There is still light ahead but not knowing what form it will take. You created something beautiful and absurd that ignored rules, sending off its ramifications in all directions with laughter and wonder heard in the distance. The heart knows what the heart knows. But, maybe the soul knows what the soul knows. Because although your heart is broken, something deeper in you is giving its approval. Even though you don’t know why it all came to be, you accepted the gauntlet laid down before you. Oh, it can’t be me. I’m too old. I’m too young. I’m too fat. I’m too dumb. You bravely moved past all your doubts and dared to love. And, something is applauding you now from a safe, sacred place separate from the pain. Something is gained in what looks like loss. You’re changed. Something subtle in that energy of what makes you *you*. You’ve gained some invisible tools, but the results of those tools will be become very visible in the soon-to-be future. The way you carry yourself. The way you are gentle with the pain of others. The way you understand. That feeling of being in love. That feeling of bottoms falling out of floors over and over and over again upon the sight of that person had a purpose. Removing all those floors created depth. You’ll always adore that special one, but you can adore yourself, too. You’re a manifestor. You make magic. Look what you can create with your power! The sun doesn’t worry if the flower loves it back. It just sheds its light. And, now you can shine it all over. And, you’ve got so, so, *SO!* much light to give! And, there it is: underneath the aching, a feeling of being carried. Your soul whispering, “I’ve saved something very special for you. What fun would it be without some mystery?” And, you’re closer to it because you dared to love. You followed a path where there had been no path before it. There are no winners. No losers. No victims. You’re in a dance with the divine. And because you chose to love, and choose to love, love will come back to you. Like the bodies in the heavens, it travels in a circle. And you are embraced from all sides. I love you. ❤️

*That was 2 years ago today, 4/7/19!!* Maybe she *does* love you back – yay!!!! But in the two years that have passed, you’ve realized it’s not about the getting, it’s the giving! It lights you up! Lord, please show me where to shine my light today kind-of-stuff!! And on those tougher days, Lord, please fill me with any light at all. Because you’re a healer. You’re a creator, not a victim! You’re light and happy in your natural state! Like that joy of giving stuff away that’s cluttering up the house! It’s a more freeing feeling than going on a shopping spree and loading stuff in! In a way, that first thing is the better feeling! Costs a lot less! And you feel light and free in giving things away, and your own load is lightened. Kinda like love right there! What a thrill to be that for somebody else! When everybody wants something from somebody, you can be that one who simply wants to lift them up with no strings attached! Everyone feels a little lighter and freer in those moments. No baggage! No dragging those rattling chains along by your ankle! I love ol’ Friar Giles!! “*Blessed is she who loves, and therefore does not desire to be loved. Blessed is he who fears, and therefore does not desire to be feared. … And, because these are great things, the foolish do not rise to them.” But you’re rising pretty good!! To the point when that old aching comes along, you immediately ask yourself, “Okay, what does my ego feel it’s not getting today?” And you address it, and realize it’s imagined. And both you and your ego know you feel better when you cast that feeling aside and just get back to more giving, more healing, more lifting up! Selfless and yet selfish in a good way – cuz you find that’s where that lightness feeling has been waiting for you again. Problem solved! 🙂 Not a bad way to make a living!! You’re so beautiful. It’s my greatest joy on earth to adore you. And you’re doing such great things!! And the only thing better than today is tomorrow. You are faith and hope incarnate. I love you!! 💜😌🌟